AU Revolution of Idiocy
by LemonStickInsect
Summary: Sick of all the sappy romance AUs? Bored of all the same plots-ideas? Well wait no more because the AU Revolution of Idiocy has ARRIVED! A short series of short AUs
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first published attempt at writing a story, so be nice. **

**Disclaimer: I'm Not Rick so I don't own anything but the plot.  
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****Kindergarten Friends**

It was a normal Sunday afternoon, Sally Jackson having dropped off her young son Percy with her good friend Helen Chase, left to work at a candy store in the city.

Percy and Annabeth were watching one of their favourite shows, Barny.

Sitting in front of the TV on the light brown carpeting, Percy and Annabeth were having one of their daily probably scheduled arguments.

"But It can work can't it Anniebeth?"

Annabeth crossed her arms in frustration and pouted "But Percy, We can't bring Barny to life he's a person dressed up in a costoo..costume!"

"NOOO, Anniebeth don't lie" screamed Percy. Then he quickly got up and blocked the speakers of the TV with his hands, "Don't worry Mr. Barny, Anniebeth was only joking, she didn't mean it" He then turned to meet his best friend "Take it BACK!"

"But Percy, Mr. Barny isn't real!" sighed Annabeth. Flinging her Arms in air in exasperation she said "You know what Pwercy, I'll try and bwing Mr. Barny to life, but it won't work!"

Over the following weeks Annabeth promptly started working on making Mr. Barny, using her knowledge of Architecture and design that can only be gained by years of

Extreme- professional Lego building and using her and Percy's seemingly endless supply of Barny dolls. Every once in a while Percy would look over her shoulder.

"Anniebeth why can't you finish bwinging Mr. Barny to Life?"

"Percy, why can't you wait?"

"But I want Mr. Barny NOW!" screamed Percy. He then sat on the ground arms crossed.

Eventually after several weeks Mr. Barny was completed.

Annabeth looked at her creation. In front of her was a giant purple dinosaur towering over her 7 year old height. Percy was next to her jumping with excitement that only a 6 and a Half year old would have. 'YAY, Anniebeth made Mr. Barny, YAY"

Annabeth then pressed a small red button on the Dinosaurs thigh. A whirring sound started and Annabeth and Percy took a few steps back. Suddenly It's head came up, the neck twitched and the eyes glowed red for a second then it turned into a piercing-evil yellow.

"Hello children," spoke a raspy voice.

Percy slowly and nervously walked up to the Dinosaur "Mr. Barny, can you sing us a song?"

"Why sure kids," spoke Barny as it stood to its full height. "I love you, you love me, lets all come and F*** barny with a g…"

Percy gasped, "MR. BARNY SAY NAUGHTY WORD," he then promptly ran up and kneed him where the sun don't shine.

"Bad Mr. Barny" screamed Percy as he started kicking it with his feet.

"NOO," screamed Annabeth as she ran up and yanked Percy off of Barny. "Mr. Barny are you okay?"

"Why yes little girl," spoke the raspy voice.

"Get away from Anniebeth" screamed Percy as he then kicked Barny's head off.

"PERCY, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE,' shrieked Annabeth.

"That wasn't Mr. Barny," exclaimed Percy

At that point, Mrs Jackson entered the room, "Percy, Annabeth I brought some free samples from work!"

Hearing the prospect of candy, Percy and Annabeth followed Mrs Jackson out of the room to attack the legendary Candy Bag, their previous argument completely forgotten.

Later that night After Annabeth was in bed and Percy was home.

Helen Chase was sorting the toys form Annabeth's work-room when she came across the dinosaur in the middle. "What a strange toy, and what is this button" She pressed the button.

"HELLO"

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**Like it? Hate it? REVIEW! Totally Random I know.  
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	2. Date Night

**IMPORTANT READ!**

** Now some people were confused so I'm gonna explain some basics. Annabeth created an Evil Barny because no ones perfect it was a mistake on her part. The AU revolution is where i get some plots and add randoms to it and still maintain the whole plot, so some chapters won't be as funny but will lean more to romance then humor.**

**Anyway, thank you DaughterOfHermesWatchUrWallet for being an awesome Beta reader.**

**Disclaimer:**

**LSI: I'm not Rick**

**Chiron : *GASP* GET HIM**

**LSI : Eep  
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Date Night**

Percy Jackson, collapsed into a nice brown, comfortable couch, sinking into the brown softness. He sat there thinking of the horrible day he just had. In Maths, he miscalculated his jump when going down the steps to get to his desk and ending up falling head first into the podium in front of the entire class and his teacher. Biology wasn't that much entertaining as well, unless you were one of the several spectators around him. While investigating the effects of heat on plant cells, he accidentally set the specimen on fire, which was then 'accidentally' transferred to a cleaning trolley which happened to be passing and let's just say Easy Off Bam lived up to its name.

The door slammed open and his room-mate Nico Di Angelo appeared still grinning from watching his Epic Fail. Nico put his hand up in the air in front of him as if viewing a painting, "Bam and the dirt is gone, however in this case so is the half wall!" exclaimed Nico.

"Shut up Nico, I'm not in the mood, can't you leave me alone?" mumbled Percy with his face in the pillow.

"Well, I know what will cheer you up, how about a blind date?"

"Let me think a about it…NO"

"I knew you would say that so I signed you up anyway!"

At that point Percy sat up instantly, eyes wide and calculating his chances of survival as much as a kelp head could.

_Flashback_

_Percy stood in front of the mirror fixing his tux. Nico had signed himself and Percy on blind dates and they__ were meeting up at a fancy restaurant, hence the fancy clothes._

_Nico walked in, "Perce you done yet? We gotta go," sighed Nico tapping his watch._

_Later at the restaurant after Nico and his date left to do 'stuff' , __**(*GASP* you all have sick minds, they **__**could be drinking coffee) **__Percy sat waiting for his date. The tinkling of a bell sound informed him of the arrival of another diner; he looked up and nearly fainted._

"_MR. JACKSON WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!" screamed Ms. Dodds._

"_Oh, Gods no…kill me now!" __whimpered Percy. He took a better look at his algebra teacher, she was wearing a full body dress that was scarring Percy's precious little mind. He was definitely bleaching his eyes later._

"_Er…hi ms Dodds."_

_She growled._

"_So... your my date?" I pray to Z__eus, Athena, Hades, Poseidon, Buddha, Apollo, Herme…he was cut off from his praying by her answer._

"_Why weren't you at class today, it was only 2 hours ago and you don't look sick."_

"…_well, would you look at the time, I have to go, need to wake up early __for the morning class, the teacher is really a b***h." quickly replied Percy while scrambling for the door._

"_I have you for the morning Mr Jackson," said Ms Dodds, while raising an eyebrow._

"_Well, then that just confirms my suspicions, GOTTA GO!" and hav__ing said that Percy bolted for his car._

_End Flashback_

"Perce, you there?" asked Nico, while waving his hand in front of Percy's face.

"Ye-Yeah, def-definitely fine," replied Percy while lying back and curling into a little ball.

"You don't look fine…maybe I should get you some sushi!" Nico exclaimed looking genuinely concerned for his friends physical and mental health.

"I'm fine, don't worry Nico… oh and make sure it has salmon."

"HAH If your Kelp Head has enough room to process sushi then there is still hope the, DATE WILL CARRY ON!" screamed Nico while pointing his finger in the air.

"Nooooo!" screamed Percy, though he didn't have any choice as Nico was making extra effort to drag him out.

Later that night, after Nico managed to take his date, a strange red-head **(You know who I mean) **off to watch some movie, Percy sat once again, alone. He wasn't a fan of clichés and he definitely wasn't hoping of a recurrence of the previous date. The bells started Tinkling.

"It's now or never, though never seems a very appealing option" mumbled Percy, he looked up and down-right fell off his seat.

"Are you okay…Wait OMG PERCY?"

"Hey Annabeth, long time no see." He replied while standing back up.

"Percy, It's been years ever since you left summer camp, everyone missed you!" exclaimed Annabeth.

For once Nico got something right thought Percy, this was short-lived as there were screams outside and he turned around just in time to see Nico smash head first into the window.

Nico POV

"So that was a great movie, but do you know how much trees they chopped down making the field?" **(It's not an actual movie, I'm making stuff up now)** exclaimed Rachael.

"You cares, its just some tree."

'WHAT WAS THAT!"

"Oh hell no."

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**Was that too non-random or just right? REVIEW!  
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